A Glass Full of Water

Margaret Sadler is no longer with us, but she left this world a better place…  Margaret never sought the limelight for herself and yet as a Karitane nurse helped care for many children including the famous Lawson Quins in the 1960’s and later years. She was mentioned fondly in Paul Little’s harrowing (in parts) book ‘Stolen Lives:The untold story of the Lawson Quins’. I also wrote two short stories titled Margaret and Teamwork in my memoir, ‘The Trouble with Twins’ as a way of honouring her legacy with our family. The context of this blog post is that Margaret was employed by our parents in the late 1950’s and early 1960’s to help mum with four children under 5 (Soon to be five and then six). We weren’t always easy to look after but Margaret unconditionally loved us all. My twin brother and my sisters remember her fondly as a person who was patient, comforting, always there for us, a generous giver, gentle, kind, compassionate, loyal and full of common sense. She had a wonderful se...

Ever heard of Marla Kavanaugh? I hadn’t either until I watched TV 1 Breakfast news last Friday. I recognised her face though. Marla sang our national anthem at the All Blacks game against Fiji in San Diego.  Let’s just say it didn’t go well. Marla showed courage, grace and eloquence to tell viewers of her and her families suffering under the weight of vitriolic comments about her performance. She described the messages as ‘absolutely savage’. They even threatened her not to come back to New Zealand. She went on to say, “The worst of it were the people who targeted her cleft-affected daughter and made fun of her.” Marla described words that were spoken about and to her as dangerous. They sure were. No one deserves abuse like that. I often despair about the misuse of social media in this way.  My dad used to say to me. “Son, if you’ve got nothing nice to say, say nothing”. He was and is right. Our words need to be respectful and encouraging. They need to inspire, motivate and of...

Ever been lonely? Ever been bullied? We all have. At school? In the workforce? Let’s look at a creative way of helping people in a ‘face to face’ way as they deal with life’s difficulties. A Raglan local, Tim Turner recently visited Te Uku school and other local schools to deliver a beautifully crafted Buddy Seat. Thanks Tim! His generosity of spirit and craftsmanship and the sponsors generosity of donated materials is acknowledged in The Raglan Chronicle 8th August, hard copy and online edition. Download the article for more information. A Buddy Seat (bench) is used in the following ways. Children can sit on the seat to indicate they are feeling a bit sad, left out or isolated and they need another child to reach out to them. Children can then see that one of their peers needs someone to talk to or play with. So simple.  A buddy seat is more than just a place to sit. It is a place to connect. (Keep in mind that the school culture and values need to reflect what the seat is trying ...

The classroom was quiet. All children were furiously writing. Honest and open thoughts were actively encouraged and engagement in the task couldn’t be faulted. Studious looks could be seen.  The day was nearly over in the Year 3/4 class at Te Uku Primary. After a few minutes, my colleague raised her voice a little. “Right everyone. Sharing time.”  Notebooks were clutched and insights into gratitude flowed around the class - “Thanks for a wonderful teacher, my dry house, my beautiful sister, my family, my dad cause it’s his birthday, my kind mum, my baby brother, God and Jesus, fish in the sea, not having war, Matariki, the rain cause we got to watch a movie, grandparents, a safe cosy bed, for love and care I get at home, a roof over my head, I’m grateful for being alive because some people aren’t.” Different, honest and individual thoughts and reasons why the students felt grateful. Shared smiles between the reader and audience rippled around the circle. Don’t you love it when...

  A car roared up and down the road outside my home office. By the time it passed the third time I’d had enough and walked down the road where I saw the car parked. I was met with a tirade of abuse, followed by threats, (including him telling me he knew where I lived and me telling him I knew where he lived!), an uppercut to my jaw and a phone call to the police. Two police officers spoke to me some weeks later and asked if I wanted to take further action. I explained that I had another option, which was for the assailant to meet me in person and offer a genuine apology. The officers looked surprised and some weeks later I shook hands with Lawrie outside his house. He apologised, I told him I forgave him and he gave me produce from his garden.  This was the beginning of a very special friendship. I would regularly visit Lawrie and would always leave with gifts.  Unfortunately Lawrie suffered a massive stroke which the doctors said would have killed most people. He could n...

We were given a large new carpet offcut by the company that had put new carpet into our house. It was cut to fit in our small sleep out room. There was a substantial amount left. What to do with it? Val spoke with a local who looks after a pop up pantry in our town and has extensive local knowledge of people in need.  She picked up the carpet and delivered it to a family where both parents work, but are barely able to cover their weekly costs. The family had no lounge floor covering so it suited them perfectly. We also had a mini portable oven that we used during our house renovations. The oven was still in great condition. In short, the oven, along with an electric frypan, was delivered to the same family where they were immediately put to good use rather than gather dust in our storage shed. The above goods could have been sold on Trade Me or another similar site. But, why should we always do that? Perhaps it’s time for a mindset change… POINTS to PONDER Why must eve...

  Kronic is synthetic cannabis. For a time in New Zealand it was legally available in dairies. In my view (and the view of many others) it was a scourge in our society. Dairies were getting robbed for the drug and there was an increase in associated anti-social behaviour.  A number of dairy owners whose only imperative was to make money at the expense of our younger generation would sell the drug. We had two local dairies where we used to live in Hamilton. One owner to his credit displayed a sign showing that he did not sell Kronic. I thanked him for choosing to do this. The other owner did not… So, each Saturday morning for a couple of months I visited his shop, purchased a newspaper and then challenged him with a variety of questions.  “Would you sell this rubbish to your sons?”  “What profit do you make on each sold item?”  “Why are you making this choice?”  Most times his answer was to look at me in stony silence. Eventually, due to public pressure, Kr...